simtarts

Previous Updates
| 1.0 |
| 2.0 | | 2.1 | 2.2 | 2.3 |

Warnings: foul language and sim-sexings

Last time on the Coffy Legacy, Foxy and Cleo graduated from La Fiesta Tech with honors. Cleo found love with Chuck Hayes, and Foxy found love with Tank Grunt and Malcolm Landgrabb. Now that Foxy's been chosen as heir, though, she'll have to find a townie to love, marry, and spawn with.

I also remodeled the house last time, and shall commence with the grand tour.

Entryway.

Living room, with a reading nook, "kreativity korner," and office area.

Kitchen with eat-in dining area.

Master suite for the current heir, and small attached bath.

Bedroom designed with teens in mind.

Bedroom designed with children in mind.

Nursery.

Here's Marcus, modeling the jack-and-jill bathroom that goes between the
kid bedroom and the teen bedroom.

And heres a random bathroom in the hallway.

This is the "elder suite" and bath, to be used by whomever is closest to
their twilight years.

And here's the front and back of the house, and a shot of Chloe Gonzaga
thinkin' bout brains. I totally spaced getting an overhead shot of the
house, oops. I also completely ran out of money and couldn't do anything
to the yard. My plan is to just add on to it little by little as the money
comes in.

This basically sums up everyone's reaction to the house remodel. They
HATED IT. D:

Now that she's not furious with Chloe Gonzaga, Foxy has decided to make
friends. This does not go over well with Chloe, who has like a total
of 5 personality points, and none of them are in the "nice" column.

Zombies have gravity-defying powers and can keep their brains in their
bowls. Comes in handy for that lurching walk across the kitchen.

Foxy: Congrats on being hated by so many!
Chloe Gonzaga: :)

But hatred can only get you so far when you're a horny romance zombie.

Miss Pam is getting close to the top of the adventurer career, but I kind
of want her to not get promoted so she can keep this FIERCE outfit!

It's time for Foxy to find a husband, and she doesn't look too happy about it.

Foxy: What's the point? You hate everyone I like. You didn't let
me marry Tank OR Malcolm!
Me: Come'on, that's not true. Those two fellas were playables and we
need to find you a townie.
Foxy: It is to true. You think I have bad taste.
Me: No, not at--

Foxy: GOOD! Because I want *points like John McCain* THAT ONE!
Me: Okay, your taste does suck. He has a total ape-face. Couldn't
you at least sprakle-imprint on the blond romance sim sitting next to him?

Somehow, I think she's retaliating against me.

Foxy: Look, all this stress to find a spouse is making me mental. Can
we go home?
Me: No.

And we didn't go home. I sent her to everylot I could think of, even ones
I'd never been to before, like parks and art galleries. She either hated
everyone there or would zero in on the FUG. D:

FINALLY, Foxy finds a hot dude that she likes. She does not seem to realize
that hot dude is actually a hot girl.

Foxy: I could be convinced. Check out that ass!
Me: No no no..on to the next lot with you.

Oh, Al is hot, is he? Well, let's get a better look.

It's dark in this karaoke bar, but Al really IS kind of hot!

Foxy goes in for the kill and Al agrees to go out on a date with her.

Foxy: Islands in the stream, that is what we are...
Al: *gives microphone head*

Many backrubs, joke, pillowfights, and flirts later.... it's a ~DREAM*
date! And Al wants into this legacy BAD.

HEY I KNOW WE WERE JUST ON A DATE AND STUFF BUT WHY DON'T YOU DROP
EVERYTHING AND COME ON OVER TO THE COFFY CRIB?

A promising greeting!

He did come over, and he brought the blond romance sim with him. Perhaps
Chloe Gonzaga will find an ACR-induced love match???

Al cleans up very nicely. I also tried to use the wardrobe adjuster to
put him in a new outfit, but it wasn't working. And it ended up causing
problems later...as you'll see.

Blondie: I don't get it...you live here but you don't like it? So
why don't you just pack up and leave, then?

Chloe Gonzaga: I would, but I am jobless and lazy, and at least
it's free if I live here.

Chloe Gonzaga: They make me sleep outside, though. In the freezing,
wintry snow.

Blondie: But don't you live in the desert? It's pretty much sunny
and warm all the time.

Don't listen to her, Blondie! She's just a lying liar who lies. And she's
also an idiot. Blondie stood up and flirted with her and she rejected him!
Despite it being in her wants panel for AGES. Anyway, I didn't get a picture
of it but trust me, it did happen.

Miss Pam: Shit, son! I know this family's a bit odd, what with the
zombie slave and the history of killing off anyone who messes with us, but
sometimes you gotta break a few eggs to get an omelette, know what I mean?
Al: Not...really.
Miss Pam: Fine then. Pretend I just gave the usual line about fertilizing
my daughter's eggs.

So it was at this point that I quit the game. When I loaded it back up a day
or two later, Al was invisible! I could see his thought bubbles and he could
interact with the environment, but he was just... not there! So I used
wardrobe adjuster to change everyone into formal wear and....

D: D: D:
That is NOT normal!

This is also not normal!

Miss Pam: This is some freaky shit goin' down here. I better sit
and make sure everthing's okay.

...knowledge sims.

I finally sent Al home and then invited him back. He was normal again!
Albiet with different hair and a camel toe. D:

Foxy asks him to move in, and he agrees!

Whew, much better! He's got a bit of a clean-cut metrosexual look going.
Is the word 'metrosexual' even used by the general populous anymore? Or
do we all agree that 'secretly gay' works better?

I don't remember his exact stats, but he's a gemini fortune sim who
wants to be a criminal mastermind. He already had a GOOD job as a
senator, but I made him quit that so he could start over and work on
the LTW.

Al has a very PIERCING stare. O_O

Al: Oh, how I long to be the omelette on her plate that she
grinds to a pulp with her sharp, sensual teeth...
Foxy Why is the back of my neck burning?

Al: Oh, how I long to be the ivories that she tickles with
her sharp, sensual fingers...
Foxy: BB if you're gonna stand there like that, could you at least
leave me a tip?

So he does! And then dances the dance of the shameful.

Uggggh. I hate chance cards, but I can't really bring myself to ignore them!

THANKS MARCUS. THAT LEAVES US WITH LIKE $300.

I refuse to take the blame, obviously.

The good news is that Foxy got an entry-level job that's just two steps
away from the top of the journalism career. Guess college pays off!

Al keeps the bed warm for when she gets home from work.

Foxy is so touched that she drops down to one knee...to serenade him,
perhaps?

Nope, to spring the big question!

And Al accepts!

Did proposing really wear you out that much, Foxy? You're not even pregnant
yet! This is not a good sign.

What kind of three-point playful sim are you? Oh, one without a job...
carry on, then!

Since she has no real friends in the house, you'd think Chloe Gonzaga would
try to suck up to the one person in the house who has no reason to hate her,
right? Well, you'd think wrong.

Poor Al. You didn't know what you were getting into, did you?

He gets pretty bitchy with her, but then immediately asks her if she would
like to play catch with him.

He still doesn't know what he's getting into. Chloe Gonzaga throws HARD
for a corpse.

Al: IHAYCHU.

Miss Pam and Al have one bolt. I don't -think- it will go anywhere, but
I think Miss Pam may be secretly hoping that it does.
Miss Pam: Whatever. I have my back turned, don't I?
Mr: Yes, but you're facing a mirror.

A woman of her age and her fierceness has needs.

Most of the time, though, she's wearing that damn helmet and working on
that impossible "max all skills" LTW.

Marcus: So, are you enjoying sex with my daughter?

Al: Yup. How's the sex going with your wife?

Such an intellectually-stimulating, chess-appropriate conversation.

Jan Tellerman, will you ever learn?

Al finally got a low-end job in the criminal career track, and he's always
bringing home jerks like this, who go around annoying Foxy and pouring
bubbles in the new backyard fountain.

I C U THAR, JAN!
Seriously, does this glitch happen to anyone else?

Criminy, that was fast! It's not her LTW, but we'll gladly take the
high-paying salary!

Being a fortune sim, Al's muscles go all special whenever there's money
within grabbing range.

Chloe Gonzaga rarely sleeps in her bed these days. She just catches "naps"
during the prime time action.

And finally, the moment everyone's been waiting for...a wedding party!

I'd actually rather not have one, but Foxy, being a popularity sim, rolls
the want to have a party like twice a day.

I invited Cleo, Jin, Marcus' ex-children, and Blondie.

Things get off to a rollicking start when Chloe Gonzaga pees herself.

And then a wolf saunters in and licks it up. -_-

We better get a move on before this thing falls apart. Quick, Foxy!
Recite your vows!
Foxy: I'll make love to you, like you want me too...

Vows!

Al: Girl are you ready, it's gonna be a long night..throw your clothes
on the floor...I'm gonna take my clothes off too

How exactly do Boyz 2 Men lyrics count as vows? I have no idea.

Foxy: Baby tonight is your night...and I will do you right.

Finally!

Al: Open up, baby. Open up wider. Come on, wider! I know you can
open up more than that, just last night you...

Foxy: Mrrrrphmmm!

Wow.

Now that Al has secured his place in the household, he can fart in front
of everyone comfortably.

Foxy does not want.

Too late to get a refund now, it's honeymoon time!

I like the action shot of her dress. :D

And we'll leave off there for now! Next time we should see the ushering in
of generation three. :D